[Top 50] Parks And Rec Pick Up Lines

by Maria Line

“Treat yo self. — Tom Haverford/Donna Meagle
“Windows are the eyes of the house. — Andy Dwyer
“There is only one bad word: taxes. — Ron Swanson
“I’m not interested in caring about people. — Ron Swanson
“Clear alcohols are for rich women on diets. — Ron Swanson
“Yes I am a hunter, and it’s you season.” (Season 2, Episode 20)
“Never half-A$$ two things. Whole-A$$ one thing. — Ron Swanson
[Top 50] Parks And Rec Pick Up Lines
[Top 50] Parks And Rec Pick Up Lines
“If you don’t like what I post, don’t follow me. — Donna Meagle
“I’m not crying, okay? I’m just allergic to jerks. — Andy Dwyer
“Horizons are dumb. Never broaden your horizons. — April Ludgate
“Hi, I’m Tom, I have a raccoon on my head.” (Season 2, Episode 20)
“Girl, you’re more precious than Precious.” (Season 2, Episode 20)
“I don’t want to do things. I want to not do things. — April Ludgate
“I will take a free breakfast buffet anytime, anyplace. — Ron Swanson
“Any dog under 50 pounds is a cat, and cats are useless. — Ron Swanson
“Use him. Abuse him. Lose him. That’s the Meagle motto. — Donna Meagle
“Love? Love fades away. But things? Things are forever. — Tom Haverford
“Sometimes you gotta work a little, so you can ball a lot. — Tom Haverford
“I tried to make ramen in the coffee pot and broke everything. — Andy Dwyer
“Not loving ’90s R&B is number three on the Oh No-Nos list. — Tom Haverford
“No, no, no, that’s way too much responsibility for me. — Jean-Ralphio Saperstein
“When I bet on horses, I never lose. Why? I bet on all the horses. — Tom Haverford
“I stand by my decision to avoid salad and other disgusting things. — Leslie Knope
“Jogging is the worst. I know it keeps you healthy, but god, at what cost? — Ann Perkins
“I have no idea what I’m doing, but I know I’m doing it really, really well. — Andy Dwyer
“I am not a sore loser. I just prefer to win, and when I don’t I get furious. — Ron Swanson
“Time is money; money is power; power is pizza; pizza is knowledge. Let’s go! — April Ludgate
“History began on July 4, 1776. Everything that happened before that was a mistake. — Ron Swanson
“I’m fine. It’s just that life is pointless, and nothing matters, and I’m always tired. — Andy Dwyer
“When life gives you lemons, steal your grandma’s jewelry and go clubbin’. — Jean-Ralphio Saperstein
“When I get bummed out, I take my shirt off because the bad feelings make me feel sweaty. — Andy Dwyer
“Jessica Wicks! Hey, boo. Are you aging in reverse? ‘Cause you look barely legal.” (Season 2: Episode 21)
“Joan, let’s make a pact, OK? If we’re both still single in an hour, let’s get married.” (Season 3: Episode 5)
“Calzones are pointless. They’re just pizza that’s harder to eat. No one likes them. Good day, sir. — Leslie Knope
“No, I don’t text her, ‘It was nice meeting you.’ I wait eight weeks and I text her, ‘What’s crackin?’” (Season 2: Episode 13)
[Tom is playing with a stethoscope, using it on Leslie Knope (Amy Poehler)] “Oh my god. Your BØØBs are dead!” (Season 1, Episode 6)
“If I had an hour alone with Robert Pattinson, he would forget all about Skinnylegs McGee. I’ll tell you that much. — Donna Meagle
“I have never taken the high road. But I tell other people to ’cause then there’s more room for me on the low road. — Tom Haverford
“Excuse me! Are there any strippers here? Former strippers? Non-dancers but you’re feeling a little bit drunk?” (Season 3: Episode 9)
“Scientists believe that the first human being who will live 150 years has already been born. I believe I am that human being. — Chris Traeger
“Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Don’t teach a man to fish…and feed yourself. He’s a grown man. And fishing’s not that hard. — Ron Swanson
“We need to remember what’s important in life: Friends, waffles and work. Or waffles, friends, work. It doesn’t matter. But work is third. — Leslie Knope
“I’m sure he’s not cheating on you. But if he is, he’s a monster. And if he’s not, you guys are great together. But if he is, I will kill him. — Leslie Knope
“Joan, listen to me. This harvest festival, it’s gonna knock your socks off and when it does, I’m gonna be there to give you a foot mA$$age. To completion.” (Season 3: Episode 7)
“Sometimes when you make an omelet, you’ve gotta break a few eggs. What’s the alternative? No omelets at all? Who wants to live in that kind of world? Maybe birds. Then all their babies would live. — Leslie Knope
“Boo-boo bear. It’s one of several nicknames I’ve made up for you. And you can choose which one you like best, ’cause I want this to be a give and take. …We have cookie tush, Winnie the Boo, lady presh-presh, Annberry sauce, Annie get your boo, Tommy’s girl, Annie bananie…” (Season 4: Episode 15

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