What do you get from a pampered cow? Spoiled milk.
Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a-salted.
How do celebrities stay cool? They have many fans!
Being struck by lightning is a shocking experience!
What sound do porcupines make when they kiss? Ouch!
Time flies like an arrow. Fruit flies like a banana.
Why are fish so smart? Because they live in schools.
She had a photographic memory but never developed it.
He had a photographic memory that was never developed.
A chicken crossing the road is truly poultry in motion.
I’ve been to the dentist many times so I know the drill.
I went to a seafood disco last week… and pulled a mussel.
What musical is about a train conductor? “My Fare, Lady”.
A bicycle can’t stand on its own because it is two-tired.
I went to a seafood disco last week….and pulled a mussel.
Being struck by lightning is really a shocking experience!
Why are teddy bears never hungry? They are always stuffed!
Let’s talk about rights and lefts. You’re right, so I left.
Why did the lion spit out the clown? Because he tasted funny!
What do you get when you cross a snake and a pie? A pie-thon!
Why did the turkey cross the road? To prove he wasn’t chicken!
I used to be twins. My mother has a picture of me when I was two.
Why do fish live in salt water? Because pepper makes them sneeze!
A man drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.
The streets in the capital of Afghanistan are paved with Kabulstones.
A dog gave birth to puppies near the road and was cited for littering.
No matter how much you push the envelope, it will still be stationery.
I went to buy some camouflage trousers yesterday but couldn’t find any.
What do you call a marketplace that sells weird stuff? A bizarre bazaar!
What do you get when a chicken lays an egg on top of a barn? An egg roll!
How does a lion greet the other animals in the field? Pleased to eat you.
What did the angry mother say to the boiling pot of spaghetti? Simmer down!
“What’s purple and 5000 miles long?” “Ooh! I know! The Grape Wall of China!”
When does a well-dressed lion look like a weed? When he’s a dandelion (dandy lion).
What did the judge say when the skunk walked into the court room? Odor in the court!
Two fish are in a tank. One says to the other, “Err…so how do you drive this thing?”
Why did the bumble bee leave the house? It heard the school was having a spelling bee.
The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.
Why did the golfer wear two pairs of pants to the game? Just in case he got a hole in one.
This duck walks into a bar and orders a beer. “Four bucks,” says the bartender. “Put it on my bill.”
The roundest knight at King Arthur’s table was Sir C^mference. He acquired his size from far too much pi.
Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The ceremony wasn’t much, but the reception was brilliant!
About Annie Rosy
Annie is a writer who likes to focus on funny pick up lines. She enjoys making people laugh and feel good, and thinks that using a clever line can be the perfect way to start a conversation. When she's not writing, Annie loves spending time with her friends and family. She's always up for trying new things, and is always looking for ways to make life more fun.
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