Im using “I keep herps” it just isnt working for me!
Wanna see my cobra? It’s almost six feet long..
Want to come home and stroke my python?
I keep heaps of pets, I have one of the rarest species in the world….the trouser snake, you might want to come back to mine and check it out”
How about… If your not interested in me at least come home and look at my 5 yr old..hes 8ft!
I’ve had crabs, but i’d rather herps”
“Wanna come back and see my frillies?”
Want to see my herps?
Wait no crap.
I have a bearded dragon…Am I getting lucky?
Lick my Tiliqua?
When I’m drunk alone late at night I like to handle my snake, but it’d be more fun if I had someone to do it with me.
“Look…No gag reflex…awwww yiss.”
What do you call a snake that is 3.14 meters long?
What do you use to get paint off a snake?
Why don’t snakes drink coffee?
Because it makes them viperactive
What do you call a snake who works for the government?
A civil serpent.
What do you call a Mexican snake
What do you give a sick snake?
Which are the best mathematicians amongst the snake family?
Who is a snake’s favorite author?
What is a snake’s favorite dance?
Why are snakes hard to fool?
They have no legs to pull.
What do you get when you cross a snake and a plane?
A Boeing constrictor.
What do snakes use to clean their car windows?