I’m feeling a little off today. Will you turn me on?
I have sugar free methadone because I’m sweet enough
I think you are suffering from a lack of Vitamin Me.
Baby, there ain’t no placebo for what I can give you.
Even Pepcid AC can’t stop my haert’s burning for you.
My love for you is like diarrhea. I can’t hold it in.
You must be a ClA$$ III, because you got my heart racing.
Are you lost Ma’am? Because heaven is a long way from here.
If eye contact occurs, strip down and rinse off immediately.
Girl you must be Sotalol, because you prolong my QT interval
Are you an Advil. Cause I’d like to take you every 2-4 hours.
Is that a Zpak in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?
Yes, we carry placebos, but you will need a fake prescription.
My love for you burns stronger than my urinary tract infection.
Hey baby, you are like Mannitol always pleasant taste and cool.
Girl you must be norepinephrine, because you make my heart race!
No that’s not an epi-pen in my pants, I’m just happy to see you.
Babe, is ur middle name Desyrel? because you gave me a priapism.
Is your name flecainide? Because u just made my heart skip a beat.
Does your left eye hurt? Because you’ve been looking right all day.
Is that a Zoladex in your pocket or are you just pleased to see me?
Your prescription for one large, um, suppository is ready for pickup.
You need to add me to methadone register, because I’m addicted to you.
Do you have a Band-Aid? Because I just scraped my knee falling for you.
I don’t always get C2 prescriptions, but when I do, I get ten at a time.
Baby I’m like Efavirenz. Go out with me and let me take your nightmares away.
You look familiar. Did we have clA$$ together? I could have sworn we had chemistry.
Hey baby, you are like a SSRI antipsychotic. It only makes sense when you are with me.
Your calves must be aching. Because you’ve been back-marching through my mind all day.
Hey, I’m like acetaminophen I’ll make sure all your pains go away when we’re together.
I must have a low creatinine clearance, because I can’t seem to get you out of my mind.
Girl you’re so expensive my insurance is requiring a prior authorization before our first date.
I think I can stop my risedronate from now on because you have significantly increased my bone strength.
Hey girl, I heard you are the pharmacist. Here is my new methadone prescription. See you everyday for the rest of our lives.
About Annie Rosy
Annie is a writer who likes to focus on funny pick up lines. She enjoys making people laugh and feel good, and thinks that using a clever line can be the perfect way to start a conversation. When she's not writing, Annie loves spending time with her friends and family. She's always up for trying new things, and is always looking for ways to make life more fun.