What drugs are you on, stupid pills?
It’s too bad stupidity isn’t painful.
Come again when you can’t stay as long.
You’ve got a face like a bag of elbows.
You’re listed in Who’s Who as What’s That.
I couldn’t warm to you if you were on fire.
A lot of people live and learn. You just live.
[Top 101] Epic Burns,Roasting Jokes And Comebacks Ever Heard!
Don’t feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
Last time I saw something like you, I flushed it.
I sure hope there’s a lifeguard in your gene pool.
You’ve got a face that could turn fresh milk sour.
You’re as strong as an ox. Just not as intelligent.
As an outsider, what do you think of the human race?
I wouldn’t pee in your ear if your brain was on fire.
If I had a face like yours, I’d teach my A$$ to talk.
You’d need twice the brains to qualify as a half-wit.
You’re so ugly you’d scare the crap out of the toilet.
You have the face of a saint. A Saint Bernard, that is.
I heard you were born on a farm. Any more in the litter?
You don’t need some beauty sleep, you need to hibernate.
Are you always so stupid or is today a special occasion?
You’re so far up your own A$$ you can lick your tonsils.
God wasted a good A$$hole when he put teeth in your mouth.
People like you don’t grow on trees. They swing from them.
You remind me of myself. Back when I was young and stupid.
Let’s go to the zoo. I’ve always wanted to meet your family.
I don’t want you to turn the other cheek – it’s just as ugly.
People like you are the reason God doesn’t talk to us anymore.
A half-wit gave you a piece of his mind, and you held on to it.
I couldn’t stop thinking about you all day today. I was at the zoo.
You need to shut your mouth ’cause all your stupidity is leaking out.
Some people bring joy wherever they go. You bring joy whenever you go.
What you lack in intelligence, you more than make up for in stupidity.
Go ahead and tell me everything you know. I’ve got a spare ten seconds.
Stop thinking everyone’s your equal. That’s offensive to a lot of people.
Every time I think of all the people that haven’t met you, I get jealous.
Everyone has the right to be stupid, but you’re just abusing the privilege.
Have you been shopping lately? They’re selling lives – you should go get yourself one.
Just let people think you’re an idiot. If you say anything, you’ll just prove them right.
You’re kind of like Rapunzel but instead of letting your hair down, you let everyone down in your life.
My phone battery lasts longer than your relationships.
Oh you’re talking to me, I thought you only talked behind my back.
My name must taste good because it’s always in your mouth.
Don’t you get tired of putting make up on two faces every morning?
Too bad you can’t count jumping to conclusions and running your mouth as exercise.
Is your drama going to an intermission soon?
I’m an acquired taste. If you don’t like me, acquire some taste.
If I wanted a B!t¢h, I would have bought a dog.
My business is my business. Unless you’re a thong, get out of my A$$.
It’s a shame you can’t Photoshop your personality.
I don’t sugarcoat $h!t. I’m not Willy Wonka.
Acting like a prick doesn’t make yours grow bigger.
The smartest thing that ever came out of your mouth was a peπ!s.
Calm down. Take a deep breath and then hold it for about twenty minutes.
Jealousy is a disease. Get well soon, B!t¢h!
When karma comes back to punch you in the face, I want to be there in case it needs help.
You have more faces than Mount Rushmore.
Sorry, sarcasm falls out of my mouth like bull$h!t falls out of yours.
Don’t mistake my silence for weakness. No one plans a murder out loud.
Yes, I am a B!t¢h — just not yours.
I’m sorry you got offended that one time you were treated the way you treat everyone all the time.
You should wear a condom on your head. If you’re going to be a D!¢K, you might as well dress like one.
Maybe you should eat make-up so you’ll be pretty on the inside too.
Being a B!t¢h is a tough job but someone has to do it.
My middle finger gets a boner every time I see you.
You’re enS#xled to your incorrect opinion.
You’re so real. A real A$$.
Whoever told you to be yourself gave you really bad advice.
If I had a face like yours I’d sue my parents.
Where’s your off button?
I didn’t change. I grew up. You should try it sometime.
I thought I had the flu, but then I realized your face makes me sick to my stomach.
The people who know me the least have the most to say.
I’m jealous of people who don’t know you.
I’m sorry that my brutal honesty inconvenienced your ego.
You sound reasonable… Time to up my medication.
Aww, it’s so cute when you try to talk about things you don’t understand.
Is there an app I can download to make you disappear?
I’m sorry, you seem to have mistaken me with a woman who will take your $h!t.
I’m visualizing duck tape over your mouth.
90% of your ‘beauty’ could be removed with a Kleenex.
I suggest you do a little soul searching. You might just find one.
Some people should use a glue stick instead of chapstick.
My hair straightener is hotter than you.
I have heels higher than your standards.
I’d smack you, but that would be animal abuse.
Why is it acceptable for you to be an idiot but not for me to point it out?
If you’re offended by my opinion, you should hear the ones I keep to myself.
If you’re going to be a smart A$$, first you have to be smart, otherwise you’re just an A$$.
Your face is fine but you will have to put a bag over that personality.
Hey, I found your nose, it’s in my business again!
I’m not an astronomer but I am pretty sure the earth revolves around the sun and not you.
I might be crazy, but crazy is better than stupid.
It’s scary to think people like you are allowed to vote.
Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you’ll find your brain back there.
No, no. I am listening. It just takes me a moment to process so much stupid information all at once.
I’m sorry, what language are you speaking? It sounds like bull$h!t.
Everyone brings happiness to a room. I do when I enter, you do when you leave.
I keep thinking you can’t get any dumber and you keep proving me wrong.
I’m not shy. I just don’t like you.
Your crazy is showing. You might want to tuck it back in.
I am allergic to stupidity, so I break out in sarcasm.
You’re like a plunger. You like to bring up old $h!t.
I am not ignoring you. I am simply giving you time to reflect on what an idiot you are being.
I hide behind sarcasm because telling you to go Fu©k yourself is rude in most social situations.
You’re the reason I prefer animals to people.
You’re not pretty enough to have such an ugly personality.
Your birth certificate is an apology letter from the condom manufacturer
I’d explain it to you but I left my English-to-DumbA$$ Dictionary at home.
You don’t like me, then Fu©k off. Problem solved. TC mark