Gee, you don’t sweat much for a fat chick.
If you were a bugger I’d pick you first
Have you read __________(name of book)___________ ? (in a bookstore)
Do you have a mirror in your pocket? (Why?) Because I could see myself in your pants.
I’m bigger and better than the S#xanic … only 200 woman went down on the S#xanic.
I’m good at math, U+I=69
Wow, somebody smells fantastic! Did you just fart?
Your place or mine?
What time do you have to be back in heaven?
You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy.
You know the Power company is looking for you coz you’re so electrifying.
You’re like a prize mouth bA$$… I don’t know if I should mount you or eat you.
Are those real?
Do you want to get out of here?
That’s a nice dress. It’d look better on the floor next to my bed.
Your Daddy must have been a Baker, cos you got the nicest set of buns I’ve ever saw.
My dog just died.
I’m a misunderstood genius.
Do you remember me from the other night? Probably not, because we really hit it off.
I used to have acne like that. Want to know how I cured it?
(At the beach) The surf isn’t the only thing that’s up.
I’m on a scavenger hunt and one of the things I need is a gorgeous woman.
Have you tried the Mocha Caramel Frappuchino? (in a coffee bar)
You must be the reason I don’t have a date tonight.
That’s a cute (or big, great) dog! What breed is he?
I love wineries. How about you?
Approach a table of women, whip out your goods and say, “See anybody here you recognize?”
Is that a tic-tac in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me?
(Blow a kiss and miss on purpose) Oops, I guess I missed, wanna try again, but a little closer?
Why don’t you come over here, sit on my lap and we’ll talk about the first thing that pops up?
Is that a book you’re reading?
I’m like novicane, Give me time I always work.
I’ve seen Deep Throat ten times. It was kind of a complicated movie, but I was finally able to get it all down.
Don’t you go to __________(name of gym, high school or college)___________?
You know how they say skin is the largest organ? Not in my case.
Do you have a job?
Aren’t you ___________(girl’s or guy’s name)__________ friend?
Hello. Are you taking any applications for a boy/girlfriend?
You are like a candy bar: half sweet and half nuts.
Can I have your phone number? I seem to have lost mine.
I’m fighting the urge to make you the happiest lady on earth tonight.
(To a man with red hair) You’ve got a Howdy Doody face, but it’s sure cute!
Was your Father a mechanic? Then how did you get such a finely tuned body?
The only thing your eyes don’t say is your name.
Listen! Just a heads-up. Herpes is a deal breaker for me.
(Approach a group of women) I’m gonna have S#x with you, you, and you. Alright, who’s first?
My husband just died.
If I told you you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Hi! I decided to quit meeting women at our family reunions.
Are you free tonight or am I gonna have to pay?
Do you surf? (Or rollerblade, mountain bike, ski, jog, etc.)
I swing both ways; I like boys – and men.
You’re like a Pringle. Once I pop ya, I just can’t stop ya.
My wife just died.
I know a great way to burn off the calories in that cake you just ate.
You sure have a great-looking tooth.
Hey baby, you must be a sweater ‘cos you got me feeling warm all over
Do you like jigsaw puzzles? Let’s go to my room and put our pieces together.
Is there a mirror in your pants? Because I can see myself in them.
You have a gorgeous smile.
Are there any more at home like you?
Do you know what’d look good on you? Me.
If you were a tree and I was a squirrel, I’d store my nuts in your hole.
Can you show me how to pick a ripe melon? (in the grocery store)
I know that Milk does the body good, but wow, how much you been drinking?
I want you to have my children; they’re in the car outside.
(Put out hand) Give me five. (after they give you five, leave your hand up)
Wasn’t that a great song? (or show or group or drummer, etc.)
Have you tried the South Beach diet?
The more I drink, the better you look.
What college do you go to? I go to UBW, the University of Big Weenies; I’m the president.
Don’t you work at __________(name of company)________?
What’s a nice girl like you doing in a place like this?
Are you into handcuffs and leather?
Seriously honey, S#x is like Pizza. Even if it bad, it still pretty darn good.
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
If I said you had a beautiful body, would you hold it against me?
Your face reminds me of a wrench. Every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up.
Have you ever seen the ___________________ Museum?
There are two kinds of people in the world: my kind and millions of jerks.
You’re like milk, I just wanna make you part of my complete breakfast.
Did your father have S#x with a carrot? Cause you’ve got nice eyes.
Was your father a thief? ‘Cause someone stole the stars from the sky and put them in your eyes.
There’s a baseball (football, soccer, basketball, hockey) game on Saturday. Want to go?
Do you wash your pants in Windex because I can see myself in them.
Could I join you? This place is really busy! (in a crowded restaurant or coffee bar)
You are so beautiful that I want to be reincarnated as your child so that I can breastfeed by you until I’m 20.
Do I know you from somewhere, because I don’t recognize you with your clothes on?
Nice legs what time do they open.
You know, I ain’t this tall. I’m just sitting on my wallet.
Believe it or not, gettin’ laid is still hard when you’re this good-looking.
I’ll give you a nickel if you tickle my pickle.
All those curves, and me with no brakes.
You be the Dairy Queen and I’ll be your Burger King: if you treat me right I’ll do it your way
Do you want to come back to my place and watch Sports Center?
Hello sugar…not you the other lump!
As she’s leaving….Hey aren’t you forgetting something? She: What? Me!
Would you like to meet for coffee sometime? (Send a note over with your name and phone number.)
You must be a high jumper, because you make my bar raise.
Screw me if I’m wrong, but is your name Janice?
I’ll be your slave tonight.
Are my undies showing? (No) Would you like them to?
I hate bars, don’t you?
Will you light my fire? (No.) Will you light my farts?
I want to bag you like some groceries.
If I were to ask you for S#x, would your answer be the same as the answer to this question?
Try some of this Merlot (or Chablis, Chardonnay, Muscat Cannelli)
Check the girls clothing tag then say –> “That’s what I thought…made in heaven”
Would you want to go jogging Saturday?
I’ve had quite a bit to drink and you’re beginning to look pretty good.
I’m betting that you cannot wait until tomorrow, because I bet that you get more and more beautiful every day.
When I’m older, I’ll look back at all of my crowning memories, and think of the day my children were born, the day I got married, and the day that I met you.
My dad always said I’d meet a great girl someday.
Would you want to take our dogs to the dog park Sunday?
If beauty were an hour, you’d be a second.
I’ve just moved you to the top of my ‘to do’ list.
Those are bodacious ta-tas!
Do you think a relationship between you and I would be all S#x, or do you think that there would be some depth to it?
I’d like to name a multiple 0rg@sm after you.
Is it that cold out or are you just smuggling tic-tacs.
What a great cat (or dog or whatever)! (at a vet’s)
That’s last call. Wanna hook up?
I have six toes on one foot.
Hey baby, ya wanna get lucky?
I’ll bet I’ve been married more times than you have!
Are you Jamaican? Because Jamaican me crazy!
Are your knees dirty? I don’t want to get my floor dirty.
I bet you $40 you’re gonna turn me down.
Do you believe in love at first sight, or should I walk by again?
What flavor is your underwear?
Great legs, what time do they open?
What’s your sign?